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Seek Good Advice

by Garrett Walters

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1.
Dad left the tractor out all winter, but it still works fine. Mow the pastor get back inside, by dinner time. Blood under my fingernails Flecks of rust, settle in my eyes. I’ll spend all these summer nights Digging holes in the yard Looking for something I’m sure I’ve lost. Cause I look at your hands. Like the piles of tools in my father’s shed. I look at your hands. Like the piles of tools in my father’s shed. I think you could fix me, with a look, if you wanted to. I think you could fix me, if you wanted to. Could you, fix my tongue it’s always moving in my mouth. Would you, fill the gap in my teeth it’s always selling me out. Would you bury me deep, let me thaw and refreeze. Would you bury me deep, when i am soft start digging me out.
2.
Take a shower, Woke up in a cold sweat again. Try and fail to remember the dream. Work up the nerve to ask you where you've been, And you laugh like I'm telling a joke, but We both know that I'm not telling a joke. So, I laugh along. I go back to bed. Wake up early, Go to work. Stand in the kitchen sweat dripping down my face, Cut the onions and cry in front of everyone. Cut the onions, say "These must be especially strong". Seek good advice. "Keep your head down girl, oh, you're doing just fine. Don't go looking under rocks, But if you do and you find something you don't want, Deny! Deny! Deny!" Pin me down, make me cry. You won't be the first or the last one tonight. I would bite my tongue for you. Taste blood, don't say a thing. Taste blood, don't say a thing. Taste blood, don't say a thing.
3.
I cover all the mirrors in the house So my heart will find it's way out. While you sit in that old red Chevy and you cry. But if I'm quiet, if I wait till the sun sets, You'll come inside. I can already hear the walls breathing in your exhausted sigh. Sleep now, don't think. Wake up later, puke in the kitchen sink. Cold wash cloth, covers your face, Fall asleep on the couch. Mourn what you are. Mourn the whole world and sleep until 9. Start moving, still tired, Carry the weight of what you are inside. But take your coffee, unapologetically, sweet with cream. I'll wake up in the morning after you're gone. Stumble out into the world, into the bright new dawn. And I'll take off running, But I'll turn around before you get off of work. I'll wait here always, I'll wait, even when it hurts. I can already feel my bones breathing in your tired sigh.
4.
The Weather 02:57
Originally written for & recorded with my old band VYVYAN as "Pulse Opera House" - vyvyan.bandcamp.com -------------------------------- This town is way to small I can feel the temperate swell at the silence That I fill with nervous questions. I am always 12 years old, I am in my sunday school, And I am ugly, scared, and I am pulling at my sleeves. So you tell me, I cannot change the weather. I know I've been a wreck, But sometimes you just can't fight the current, So I've been lying in the riverbed Painting all the rocks a brilliant red. Trying to remember the way you held your hands In those crushed velvet seats. Trying to compress. Trying to exist in a much smaller state. You called me every night at 10 To see if I still cried at the end of every movie, And your voice was so soft I always nearly fell asleep Right before you asked me, "do you still love me?" And I told you, "I cannot change the weather." I know I've been a wreck, But sometimes you just can't fight the current, So I've been lying in the riverbed Painting all the rocks a brilliant red. Trying to remember the way you held your hands In those crushed velvet seats. Trying to compress. Trying to exist in a much smaller state.
5.
Old tree in the backyard Bound to fall with the right storm Maybe it will smash my car No big deal, I’m not headed far. Down here on South Rogers I hunt all the crickets in the corners. Rearrange the bed into different spots in my room. Burn down candles, prayers to only god knows who I try to picture my life But all I can see is the back of your head Deer antlers nailed up Covering the southwest wall of a hot cluttered shed I talk all night to the back of your head But oh, surprise, it never really listens.
6.
The Devil 02:28
Originally recorded at home & released on "SMALL TALK", a split with Spaceshow (FKA Amy Bruce Spaceshow) - garrettwalters.bandcamp.com/album/small-talk -------------------------------- Midsummer, sleeping in too late. I close my eyes when you get up to leave. Count sunspots in my eyelids well past one, Then brake/make the days first promises with my heavy tongue. Well it's one foot in front of the other. Some days slower some days faster. Steady pace. I ignore useless advice. Constant distractions leaving ugly bruises on my thighs. No one knows how to be happy. It's just one foot in front of the other, Some days slower some days faster, But we, must keep up a steady pace. For we must not keep the devil waiting.
7.
Spanish Moss 03:43
Spanish moss, clouds my vision I am lost. Peel my sweat soaked clothes off my back, Bury my face in your neck Fall asleep and do not dream. Wake up, covered in sun The sharp taste of salt hot on my tongue. Lose my footing. Meet the ground, hard but sweet. Take my time till I rise up, onto my feet. Scratch at the sunburns on my arms and keep on walking. Driving home Passing empty fields filled fresh with snow I am sick Pushed back and forth by static waves. Pull over Trip on something covered Fall to my knees. Dig till my hands are numb or I find something green I am a burning car On the side of the highway Maybe in the spring when they come with their seeds they will find me. Lose my footing Meet the ground, hard but sweet. Take my time till I rise back onto my feet. Kiss the cold from my hands Count the cars as they drive right by If they come in the spring I’ll be gone somewhere where the ocean cannot so easily swallow me.
8.
26 03:52
In the basement of some punk house That's changed names and hands 5 times in the 6 years I've been here. I see you up front bobbing your head Like you've never committed a sin. While the corners of my mouth are pulled down By history. Cause when I close my eyes I'm in the overgrown yard behind 909. Honest and full. Nervous and new. But I'm 26 now, And I am mad at all of you. I lay down in the shower Have quiet thoughts of peeling the skin off my body. If I stayed still long enough, would anything change? I lie in wait for the tornado siren test on the first Friday. I measure time as it passes away. Cause when I close my eyes I'm in the overgrown yard behind 909. Honest and full. Nervous and new. But I'm 26 now. Do you still think that you could Jump the Beltane fire? I think it would eat you alive. Cause when I close my eyes I'm in the overgrown yard behind 909. Honest and full. Nervous and new. But I'm 26 now. Burnt out.
9.
Sweet Dreams 02:08
From the back of the room Hit me hard that it was me you were talkin to. I couldn't stand all those mean things you said about me Couldn’t take all the ways you didn’t understand me. Clutch my beer to my chest Try to cool my heart down Clench my teeth keep my wet eyes low Look fast, find a way out. Bust through the back door like a Hurricane from indiana. Throw open the fridge Go up to my room Pop the top of a drink and spill it all down my shirt Go to sleep with the lights and my wet cloths on Have sweet dreams Of being young. Young.
10.
Ugly 02:26
Originally recorded at home for Milwaukee's Filth Fest III comp on Permanent Scowl Records - permanentscowlrecords.bandcamp.com/album/filth-fest-iii-comp -------------------------------- Ticks crawling under my fingernails, asking for homes. High noon on the hottest day of summer I am 19 years old. Crack my knuckles and keep my eyes down low on the ground. I know I'm ugly and I'm always wanting and wanting and wanting. Eat me alive. Eat me alive. Burn down bridges and I don't think twice as I sleep In a warm bed of ash every night. I write my own name in the remains And I don't even cry. I know I'm ugly, And god knows that I'm always wanting. I am my own god. An ugly god. Eat me alive. Eat me alive. Eat me alive.

about

These songs were written from 2014 - 2018. Over the course of this album I've had five or six jobs and lived in one house.

Thanks to Eloy for the good advice.

This album was self-released on cassette. 100 copies.

credits

released April 14, 2018

"Seek Good Advice" was very thoughtfully recorded, mixed, and generally made better by Eric Ayotte at his home studio on Oolitic Drive during February & March 2018, here in Bloomington, Indiana. Eric can be contacted at: gadaboutfilmfest (at) gmail (dot) com // iamericayotte.com

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Garrett Walters Bloomington, Indiana

Hoosier Dyke

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